You wanted the job, the promotion, the sale or the assignment but they chose someone else. Being told “no” is tough and how you respond can make or break your future chances. What do you do?
1. Solicit feedback. This might not be easy, but contact the person and try to get information about your rejection. Ask for two suggestions on how you could improve. You may not get a direct reason for the rejection, but you might get a helpful tip or two.
2. Listen. You may want to gve a rebuttal. Don’t! If you listen carefully to their feedback, you will learn how to improve your chances next time.
3. Express your disappointment, but do it with dignity and composure. You can say, “ I must admit that I’m disappointed…” This shows that you really did care.
4. Reinforce the person on their decision. This is hard to do. Never bad-mouth the competition and be sincere. “Ms. X does have a lot of experience in this area.” or “I am sure she will work hard to accomplish the goal.”
5. Don’t burn bridges. If you know that Ms. X is not the right person, she will eventually show her weaknesses and the person who turned you down will become aware of them as well. Let the person know that you are still interested and are willing to be supportive. You can say something like,” If I can support you in the future, please do call on me.”
6. Stay in touch. Check back to see how things are working out and/or if there are any other opportunities for which you might be qualified. An even better opportunity may turn up!