Do you go out of your way to avoid your boss? Do you ask what kind of mood he or she is in before going to their office to ask a question? Do you only hearwhat’s wrong when you get feedback? If you answered “yes” to these questions,you probably have a bossy boss.

Having an assertive supervisor is often necessary in a workplace so things get accomplished. But when a boss steps over the line toward bullying and aggressiveness, here are some steps to address the issue.

1. Plan in advance and address theboss’s predictable concerns. For example,if you know the boss likes to examine the credit card bill, don’t wait until he asks to see it. Send a memo monthly that summarizes usage.

2. Try to get your boss to be concrete about expectations. When you get an assignment, make sure you understand all the components.

3. When a confrontation begins, ask questions to clarify what is causing the anger. Stay calm, but not condescending. Do not argumentative in return.

4. Discuss behaviors not personality. Be honest, but only discuss how the situation affects you.

5. Have patience. Some bosses are so immature that they shout at their subordinates to conceal their own mistakes, and if that’s the case, never take such a foolish supervisor’s commentsseriously.

6. If inappropriate behavior happens repeatedly, and/or you feel so stressed that it is interfering with your work or wellbeing, go to your HR department and complain.

7. If all else fails,  start looking for a new job and consider asking your interviewer,“How do you handle conflict in the workplace?”

(From Dr. Mimi’s Seminar on Dealing with Difficult People)