Dear Dr. Mimi:

I have an employee who I am certain has great ideas, but she is very shy and introverted. Others in our group are very outspoken, and if there is a silence, they will fill it. I would love to have my shyer teammate express her ideas and suggestions, but fear that she will not say a word. How can I coax her to speak up?

— Extrovert

Dear Extrovert:

First, let me explain the difference between introverts, extroverts and shy people. Introverts do not fear social situations, but prefer solitary activities. Extroverts love social situations and speak up freely. People who are shy are not necessarily introverts. They would like to socialize and speak up, but are often restrained by inner fears. Perhaps your employee is afraid of what others will think of her ideas, so she is hesitant to express herself. You may want to talk with her ahead of time to learn if she is truly shy or simply an introvert.

Here are some tips to help her feel more at ease:
         • Build a safe climate. If she is indeed shy, do not allow anyone to criticize ideas or tease within the strategic planning setting. What may seem like a benign joke can be a thought-stopper.
         • Use an outside facilitator. An outside facilitator is invaluable both before and throughout meetings. With a neutral facilitator, we conduct interviews, focus groups and/or surveys prior to meetings and learn so many things that people will never say aloud.
         • Permit silent participation and use alternative methods. People process information differently, and while they may not speak up, they are still participating by listening. Give everyone an alternative way to submit their ideas before, during or after the meeting. This can be in written or electronic form. You may want to allow people to make anonymous recommendations.
         • Give positive reinforcement. Shy people are very critical of themselves and their mistakes. When they give an idea, encourage it and ask others to build on it.