Why do people brown nose? Simply put, they are insecure! They don’t believe their work will speak for itself and/or they think they are not as good as others so they try to flatter their way to success. Yes, they appear to have ambition but rather than taking the natural direct approach of working hard and doing well, they brown nose.
What can you do about it?
Be positive but prepared. Don’t let them control your actions or the decisions that you make.
Accept their compliments with a simple “thank you” and resume the task at hand. If you dispute their remarks, they will only find another way to curry favor. If you spend too much time responding to their remarks, they will continue to waste even more of your time.
If it gets to be too much, talk with them confidentially. Let them know that while it is always nice to hear good things, the best way to earn your favor is to work hard and do well. Give an example of something that they handled well and how it pleased you. Catch them doing something right and give them a short and sincere compliment. This will boost their confidence and provides a model for what they should do.
Remind them that a well-placed genuine compliment is appreciated but too many come across as insincere and become a turn off rather than a turn on.
(From Dealing with Difficult People by Dr. Mimi Hull)
You’re Being Brown Nosed!
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