Dear Dr. Mimi:
Exactly what is work-life balance? I know that I spend a lot of time at work, and even when I am not at work, I have my cell phone and seem to always be “on call.” Is there a magic number for hours of exercise, time spent with family and friends, etc. that will balance my stressful work schedule?
—Unbalanced

Dear Unbalanced:
There is no magic number nor ratio for time spent at home versus time spent at the office that equates to perfect balance. The right balance varies from person to person. Some people can handle more hours working and some fewer. Some need more time to relax and some less.

We do know that the number of hours you work does not necessarily relate to your productivity. If you are stressed, your quality of work will go down and the “do over” rate will go up, which results in lower net productivity. We also know that women are still having a harder time balancing because they still have a “second shift” when they get home, even though their male counterparts are doing more as well.

So what can you do?:
1. Know exactly what your job is and what is expected of you. Constantly guessing at what your boss wants is stressful.

2. Set priorities. Determine what you will not give up for a job under any circumstance and hold yourself to it. Is the most important part of your week eating dinner with your family? Avoid taking a job where people routinely work past 6 p.m. or see if you can come in early and leave early. Think about what you need to be satisfied, and work to make that happen. Don’t just stew about it.

3. Identify something that you spend time on every week or at least once a month. In other words, get a hobby. If you do not have one, find one. Not only will it make you happy, but hobbies make great conversation starters.

4. Schedule time to be with friends. Meaningful friendships will not just happen, especially when balancing a career, family and hobbies. Call your friends. Figure out dates that work for a lunch or dinner. Treat it like you would treat a client appointment.

5. You mentioned exercise. It will feel good to work yourself physically after so much mental work at the office.

—Dr. Mimi